6 easy to follow steps to "do-gooding"

Do-gooding, as I see it, is doing good deeds for no appearant reason. Some would call it altruism and start a discussion if people do it in order to feel good. Or maybe they do it to avoid feeling ashamed or guilty for not having done it. However, I'm not really looking for a definition. Instead let's take a look at the mechanics.

How to do-good.

Step 1: Find your niche.
You can't do-good all the time and on every topic. The world is too full of small hurts for you to take it all on. Even Mother Theresa specialized in the orphans of Calcutta. On a world scale, you could call that a small niche. On a personal scale it was a daunting task. She made her mark on the world without trying to do it all.
Your niche should be something you care deeply about. Wether it's poverty, the environment, health or any of the millions of things it's possible to care about, choose the one that touches your heart. If you don't feel passionate about it, do-gooding is going to be a chore rather than a service of joy.

Step 2: Define your boundaries
Determine how much of your time and effort you are willing and able to invest. Make sure that the time you commit to do-gooding detract you from the other things you find important and necessary in your life. Neglecting your family, health or job will result in stress in those area's of your life. Ultimately this will negate your positive effect on the world from do-gooding. To my knowledge Mahatma Ghandi only slipped once in his efforts to change the world through non-violence and this was when he was so angry he took a swing at his wife. Don't you make the same mistake, do-gooding starts at home!

Step 3: Set the scene.
Think about place and time: are you going to be do-gooding everywhere or in a specific area. Place and time could mean you volunteer a certain amount of time to a cause of your choice, actually setting time apart, or you could make it a goal to be alert for anonymous do-gooding all the time (see: Heroes). The main thing is that you choose where and when you have the intention of doing good. It will open your eyes to do-gooding opportunities everywhere.

Step 4: Start!
This may sound obvious but starting is one of the most difficult steps. Make that phonecall to the volunteer organisation of your choice. Offer to carry your elderly neighbors groceries. Help out at the local foodbank. Pick up that first piece of litter on the ground. There's enormous power in beginning. If you're finding yourself procrastinating, putting off the do-gooding, go back to step number 1, bearing in mind that you may have set your goals too high.There's a story about a man who came to the gates of heaven and to his dismay they were closed. He wept and lamented, begged the doorman for the key. He was there for days, weeping and complaining, moaning and groaning, claiming he had always had the best of intentions and never did anybody any harm. Never once did he get up and try the handle. The door was never locked.

Step 5: Evaluate
Be sure to evaluate periodically, especially important when you're just starting out. Have you made the right choice? Is the area you're doing good in the one you feel passionate about? Are you in the right surroundings, with people feeding you in your commitment to do-gooding? Are you still spending enough time in your daily life, doing the stuff that you had a prior commitment to? Is your do-gooding effort giving you the satisfaction of a job well done? Are you doing good at your own level of competence? Can you do more? Should you do less? Evaluate if the task you've set yourself fit's in with your life and brings you joy.

Step 6: Inspire others.
You've found your niche and you're happily making a difference in the world. You're doing good on a regular basis and at a level you feel comfortable with. You're reaping the rewards, whether they be the aforementioned lack of shame and guilt or the pride you might feel in a job well worth doing, done well. It's time to inspire others to do what you did, show them how much joy you're finding in service. Show them that when you listen to your heart and find your niche everyone can do good.

Seven books on how to live joyfully

There is no manual on life, or if there is any it got lost in translation. In a way this is a good thing because it allows us to live our lives as a journey of discovery, instead of having a preemptive path towards an final goal. Chaos and turmoil are part and parcel of every day living. It's how we respond to chaos and turmoil that makes the difference. These are seven of the most amazing books written on "being human". Without fail they are enjoyable to read, shake your view of the world and can catapult you into enlightenment... if you allow them to.

1. The Art of Happiness, Dalai Lama with Howard C. Cutler.
These days the Dalai Lama needs no further introduction I suppose. However Howard Cutler makes this book into a very readable book for sceptics and believers alike. As a psychologist he has seen human frailty and he questions the Dalai Lama indepth where others might take his answers for granted. The result is a very thorough book on the pursuit of happiness. "I believe that the very purpose of our lives is to seek happiness."

2.Non violent communication, a language of life, Marshall Rosenberg.
The definitive work on communication. It redefines what communication is for, it teaches us how language can be used as a tool to create empathetic connection between people, rather than a way of getting your point across. In doing so it gives us a real, useable tool for improving relationships and furthering understanding between people. Move beyond judgement, demand and diagnoses into heart to heart contact. "What I want in my life is compassion, a flow between myself and others based on mutual giving from the heart"

3. Saying yes to life (even the hard parts), Ezra Bayda with Josh Bartok.
A charming little book of quotes, teaching you how to live in the happy acceptance of everything. A great nightstand book, to read when you lay awake worrying. "Happiness has no cause, it is our natural state of being when unobstructed".

4. Journey to center, Tom Crum.
A well written book of stories describing the authors journey to awakening throughout life, and translates them into concrete and practical tips for every day enlightenment. The stories are humorous and direct, real life experiences that everyone can relate to. "Each moment the true warrior cuts through his story and steps forth from his vision. In this there is true power."


5. Love is letting go of fear, Gerald J. Jampolsky.
A charming book written in the late seventies that in a clear and simple voice explains what the course in miracles is really all about. Concise, poignant and useable in it's simplicity and honesty, it leaves other guides to personal transformation far behind. This charming little book speaks from the heart and to the heart. "Teach only love, for that is what you are."


6. Actualizations, you don't have to rehearse to be yourself, Steward Emery.
Derived from the EST seminars this book leaves behind the rather rigorous methods used there and successfully translates the insights gained through the training. Taking a look at the paradigms that have shaped our thinking and how to tackle them. Chapter titles include: "If you make reality your enemy, you lose" and "I am you, and I love myself".


7. The hero with a thousand faces, Joseph Campbell.
Through exploration of mythical stories the book sheds light on what it means to be human. All mythical heroes are metaphores for the trials and tribulations of every day living. Rather than an instruction manual (as many selfhelp books are) a good story sticks with you and changes you from the inside out. Heroic stories have throughout the history of mankind served as examples for what it means to be human. ""the function of ritual and myth is to make possible, and then to facilitate, the jump--by analogy"

Helpful hint:
"Be who you are and say what you want, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."
~Dr. Seuss